Staying up late really makes me reevaluate my life. I feel the need to be of service to others and travel around the world to show those in need the love of Jesus. Each day is a step I take closer to achieving these dreams. I can sometimes loose sight of it when doing some pretty mundane tasks. I need to remember that my 4 hour school day and my 8 hour work day are excruciatingly boring, but it’s not what I’m doing to do forever. I definitely wasn’t designed to live the typical 9-5. I’m looking forward to my pending, unconventional career. Thank you Jesus for your continual blessings and help me to bless others #latenightthoughts
Do you remember waking up an hour before school just so you can look semi presentable? Well in high school, I was that girl. The insecurities stemmed far back into my younger years and affected every area of my life.
Each day I went to school to get an education, but my main concern was “what are people going to think of me?”
The stress and anxiety from my insecurities consumed my thoughts. I would refuse to go out in public. Contributing to this solitary behavior was the fact that I had been bullied since middle school. I had been told that I was ugly, stupid, worthless. Some might say sticks and stones, but having these negative words repeatedly told to a young and naive girl can be detrimental. Up until recently, I believed every word.
Why would anyone ever love some that was so flawed? Why would anyone want to be friends with such a weirdo? Why was I born this way? Why can’t I just fit in? I tried and tried to reinvent myself every semester hoping that I would finally be accepted by my peers, maybe I would finally accept myself.
Those years were some of the most difficult years in my life and I can stand here today and testify to every young girl out there who feels this way and say, it gets better! As cliche as it may sound, bad periods of life only last for a season.
There was this quote from the movie Gods not Dead and it goes as so: “To the wrong person, you’ll never have any worth. To the right person you will mean everything”. This really struck a cord with me because in my adolescence, I surrounded myself with people who saw me as a burden, the last option. Luckily, I had the courage to break free from the negative people and prayed for good friends and confidence in myself.
The parts in between are a blog post for another day, but the main thing is, I found happiness. I don’t hate myself anymore; I’m not fixated and consumed with self-hate. Each day I am leaning to love myself and each day, I step closer to finding who I truly am. I’m so thankful for the prayer and support from my family through those dark years and I am so fortunate for the incredible friends I have now. I’m not who I once was and I’m on the path to becoming who I’m meant to be. I’m so fortunate to have this forum to express my thoughts and also a place to paint my emotions with.
Thank you for listening
I have been researching different organizations and ways of traveling, but I want to know first hand: how should I go about it?
I am on the verge of selling everything I own and moving to Australia. I do not want to live the typical 9-5 all my life. I want to explore, I want to be cultured, I want more!!
I am currently working and going to school, I fantasize everyday of an adventurous, more meaningful life.
I know it may sound brash of me to want to pick up and leave my life behind, maybe it’s even irresponsible, but this is my life and I want to make something of it. I want God to make something of it.
What are some avenues you have gone through in order to travel or even accomplish a seemingly unattainable goal? I’m very curious to know so please, I encourage you to leave a reply.
As some of you may already know, I have this insane need and hunger for travel. I’m the type of person who constantly needs to be on the move.
Last week, I was so fortunate to have been invited on a cruise by my so very generous mother.
I experienced some amazing encounters and was able to visit a country I’d never been, Mexico. We also stopped at Catalina island.
I feel so blessed to have gone and here are a few pictures from the trip. Enjoy!
~ Xoxo Val