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Big Little Differences

Hey all!

I hope that you all are enjoying your week. As I took the time to fill my agenda with my daily obligations (such as work meetings and school deadlines) I began to ask myself, “Am I spending the majority of my time doing things that I love or at least something that brings me joy?”.

I realize that we all have obligations to work, school, or even social events that we would rather cross off our literal or figurative calendars, but that is just not the reality we live in. What I strive for in my own life is balance.

I realize that it is easier said than done, but trust me, it makes all of the difference. For every terribly boring task I am able to complete, I reward myself with something that brings me joy.

Such things include:

  • Watching an hour of YouTube
  • Reading for pleasure
  • Calling a friend
  • Painting my nails
  • Applying a glorious facemask
  • Journalling
  • Buying an article of clothing
  • Etc.,

Granted, each reward is awarded based on the amount of tasks completed or the complexity or time of a project. Having equated ratios is also key.

Another thing I am striving for this month is to weed out habits, people, and commitments that are toxic or that distract me from the important things in life.

I often find myself being that “yes” person, never wanting to disappoint or let anyone down (even if it is at my expense). One of the many things that brings me joy in life is helping others and volunteering, but on the other hand, I am a people pleaser so I allow these acts of service to take over every weekend and fill every gap of freetime that I have.

Again, balance keeps the unnecessary stresses at bay. Saying “yes” less often and removing myself from people and environments that make me feel inferior will improve my self-esteem and self-worth. In my twenty-four years of life on this Earth, I have come to the conclusion that you cannot please everyone and that I am allowed to put myself first. I should not allow myself to be put in an environment that leaves me feeling as though I need to change who I am in order to find approval from others. It simply is not worth it. This month I want to make small changes that will increase my happiness and genuinely alter my mindset and perspective in a positive way. I know that it is possible because I used to live that way. 2019 is the year that this effortful behavior continues.

 

 

 

 

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Millennial Meltdown

Hello everyone…

long time no see. I believe I created this blog when I was about 20 years old and here I am, four years later, still on the journey of “finding myself”.

My life has been a hodgepodge of both positive and negative experiences since I last posted on this platform and I cannot wait to fill you all in.

I am a millennial and my life is anything but structured and organized and I feel like a lot of twenty somethings can relate to this uneasiness about their futures and current status in life.

As cheesy as this may sound, 2019 is going to be the year that I set aside the fears or the unknown and run towards my dreams and aspirations. I am making a conscious effort to change my mindset, which in turn should and will change the trajectory of my life in a positive-forward direction.

If you are interested on whether or not I am able to pull this off, I invite you to metaphorically and literally follow me on this crazy/exciting journey we call life.

I am ready to escape from this quicksand, otherwise known as my twenties.

Sincerely,

Valthumbnail

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Summer Vacation 

A couple of weeks ago I was fortunate enough to visit Northern California for three weeks. I traveled via train (my preferred means of travel). The plan was this, to travel from Union Station to Monterey and stay with my friend for a couple of days, from Monterey to Lodi and stay with my friends for a week, and from Lodi to Lake Tahoe and stay in a cabin for another week. I said my goodbyes to my parents and hoped on the train.

Monterey, Ca

Spending the weekend with one of my best friends and experiencing “seaside living” was pretty awesome. Over the course of a couple of day, we went to the beach and boogie boarded, had a couple of nights on the town, played pool at the local hotel, and hit up numerous tourist hot spots. On the last day, we hiked at the beautiful Point Lobos. It was an overall eventful weekend. image

Lodi, Ca

My two good friends picked me up from Monterey and we took a mini road trip to Lodi. I was so excited to be reunited with my friends and spend the entire week just having fun. This being my first extended trip to my hometown after moving a year ago, I was pumped. After reuniting with my best friends we all loaded into two cars and headed back towards the coast. image I spent my remaining days just feeling like a kid again, not a care in the world. It’s such an incredible feeling when you are able to grow a long distance friendship and when you reunite, everything seems to just feel like nothing has changed ( the beauty of technology). After a week of fun in the sun, it was time to go on my annual trip to Lake Tahoe. There I would spend my birthday and explore the beautiful Forrests and lakes along the California-Nevada boarder.

Lake Tahoe, Ca

Every summer, I go on an annual trip to Tahoe, hosted by my friend’s family.  There was a group of us and we segregated ourselves via the “generational gap” it was the young ones that graduated that year from high school and all of the returning college students. Of course, it was all a joke seeing that we are all such a close group. We spent the week jet skiing, night swimming, kayaking, playing board games, and sitting on the deck just having the best conversations. image image

I remember one morning as we woke up at 4am to watch the sunrise, I just couldn’t help but think how lucky I was to be able to experience unadulterated bliss. I used those moments, as I was sitting on the dock in the silence to just remember that moment in time. In that moment, I had no worries. In that moment, all of the negativity left the world in it’s place, positivity. In that moment, I felt at one with nature. In that moment, I connected with God.

I was just to greatful have three weeks to myself, to just live life to the fullest. Those were some memories that I will cherish forever. As I’m sitting here, tying away, I’m also making a mental itinerary of the week ahead. I’m thinking about all the tests I need to take, my impending shifts at work, and numerous other tasks. I’m also excitedly awaiting my next adventure. My everyday life can be mundane, but those moments of excitement and trips, keep me going.

Sincerely, the refreshed

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The Time is Now 

I have been researching different organizations and ways of traveling, but I want to know first hand: how should I go about it? 

I am on the verge of selling everything I own and moving to Australia. I do not want to live the typical 9-5 all my life. I want to explore, I want to be cultured, I want more!!

I am currently working and going to school, I fantasize everyday of an adventurous, more meaningful life. 

I know it may sound brash of me to want to pick up and leave my life behind, maybe it’s even irresponsible, but this is my life and I want to make something of it. I want God to make something of it. 

What are some avenues you have gone through in order to travel or even accomplish a seemingly unattainable goal?  I’m very curious to know so please, I encourage you to leave a reply. 

~xo Val

  

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How Do People Make Internet Friends? 

I see it all of the time online. People always share their stories on how they met their best friends via the Internet and I am quite literally, dumbfounded.

I am constantly online. If it’s not making a dork out of myself on vine, or posting my lastest pic on IG, or writing a blog post here, I’m constantly doing something online. I have almost every social media platform and I have never once made a friend via the Internet. 

It actually quite interesting to me. I sometimes feel like people aren’t honest online, so I put up a guard to protect myself from the Internet deceivers. The majority of the people who comment on my vines or facebook message me are creepy guys and I’m smart enough to not engage in a conversation like that. 

My question to all of you is, how and where do you manage to find genuine friends online? 

~sincerely dazed and confused 

P.s. If you want to see me embarrass myself on vine, here is the link: https://vine.co/u/981780685754982400 



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You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful

“Oh, boy” this is the comment that I’ve been making in the mirror recently. I have just been feeling “blah” and especially being a female these “blah” feelings towards yourself can result in “blah” results in school, “blah” performance at work, or even “blah” experiences in social situations.
I do not strive to have a mediocre life, therefore I don’t want to feel like a mediocre person. I want to feel confident, I want to be confident.
I do not know the correct ways on achieving this desired confidence, but I will take steps that seem most logical to me.
They consist of:
1. Point out my flaws and “beautiful” attributes. These can be both physical and inner
2. Except what I cannot change and change what I can
3. Embrace the amazing aspects of myself
4. This may sound silly, but post a nice selfie on Instagram (my ig is @villarvalerie, if you wanted to know). Studies show that having people give you compliments can have positive affects on ones self-esteem ( but don’t let this be the main source)
5. Help someone in need. Helping others will improve your mood and ultimately, you can make a big change in another persons life
6. Exercise, exercise, exercise! Something as simple as a 30 minute walk or 50 jumping jacks in the morning can pave the way for a healthier life. As the cliche saying goes “when you look good, you feel good”
7. Look for and encourage the beauty in those around you. Uplift others and they will become happier people. This will have a positive affect on your environment and it just feels good to give someone a compliment and mean it!
Let me know if you have any suggestions on how to feel more beautiful and also let me know if you would like me to write a post on how I stay fit.
Until next time,
~ the girl with growing confidence

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The Unlikely Therapist

I have been in a funk the last couple of days. I have been feeling insecure, unhopeful, and unmotivated.
It’s very rare that these negative feelings last for more than 24 hours, but 72 hours later, they remained. It’s wasn’t until this afternoon that an awakening, an epiphany struck me like a freight train.
“I can choose to change my thinking,” was the inner dialogue that spoke as loud as roaring waters. I obtain the capability to put my negative and self-doubting thoughts in the bottom drawer and welcome my encouraging thoughts like the pizza guy on a Saturday night (I love my pizza).
I am making myself unhappy and for what? I only have one life to live and if I don’t use it to make a difference or positive change, then what’s the point of all of this.
God will restore my joy, but it is my choice to allow him to use me for his will. It is my responsibility to allow him to make my life fulfilling. Once I give it all to him, that is when I’ll begin to see change.

~the hopeful one

If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s command and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.
John 15:10-11

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